There’s nothing wrong with being your Parents’ Retirement Plan

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Phrankleen

Joined: Mar 2024
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There’s nothing wrong with being your Parents’ Retirement Plan


There’s nothing wrong with being your Parents’ Retirement Plan

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34 Comments

  1. Some parents will tell you your mate, Benjamin, just bought a car for his parents. They forget that Dangote, Otedola, and Adenuga are also their mates. The other day Otedola bought Ferraris for his children. Stop pushing your children to do rituals and Yahoo!

    Your children do not owe you a living. You owe them a living. They did not ask to be born. You chose to give birth to them. Work smart and leave an inheritance for them. Don’t waste your life and turn them into your retirement package in your old age! The curse of our continent is parents that want to inherit from children.

    Reno Omokri

  2. Hi Phrakleen, this resonates with me so well. After 15 years in the West, my eyes finally opened wide when I got home. I had no where to stay, expected to pay for my own accommodation and yet I had built my parents a house, educated my siblings, as a single parent as well as sent money numerous times for business ventures that never came to fruition. None of this family have ever supported any of my investments, infact they are happy to sabotage given the chance.
    A few years down the line, this so called "family" won't accept the money tree died. The sense of entitlement and emotional blackmail is real. They are now using hospital bills to solicit more funds but I'm not badging!

  3. The Ukraine invasion should reset the minds of diasporans because those who are caught in that situation but have no money saved right now only knows what they are going through. It should be an eye opener to many of us. Thank you Phrankleen for your relentless pursuit of setting us straight. Thank you for not giving up on us all. Lol.

  4. Phrankleen I miss your videos weekly. That said, people my people stop playing God. I’m Afro Brazilian, played God for 15 years out of my 20 years in the U.K. my family is now well off in brazil, my sister has a beautiful big house, I’ve helped pay for her university and she never paid me back. My father is retired and now using his check to help pay for my brother baby mama. I’m here in the U.K., come w on ter cold working sometimes take my children to work with me cos can’t afford childcare it’s a harsh reality . I was luckily to be able to turn it around and now saving towards move to Africa , but also entering the evening part of my life . Be wise my people

  5. “Remittances” sounds more like support. You are correct! Some send more to family than they put in their own household sometimes leaving the spouse to pick up more of the financial responsibilities. Your siblings think you are awesome and they can always depend on you, yet, your spouse thinks you are crap because they can’t depend on you to have their backs. Your child is in the worst public school in the ghetto so you can afford to send family money. You are sacrificing your own child because you feel obligated to buy smart tvs, help pay for siblings education, niece’s and nephew’s education , pay for marriage ceremonies,or elaborate holiday celebrations.This only perpetuates the myth that people in the west are rich. Sometimes, family at home have more than the person abroad,but, because that person lives in Europe or America they automatically are expected to send remittances.

  6. Phrankleen, this your topic is 100% on point. You have described exactly what I'm going through now. My parents , especially my father, have turned my siblings against me. For many years I live under their control, but for the past 6 years I,ve put a stop to it, because I have a child now, who I need to care for.

  7. In the western system, people have obligation to the next generation. Not to the past generation.

    To be fair, I won't really blame Nigerian parents for depending on their children. It is what our society forced on every one. It's hard to plan anything in Nigeria. Let's say you put money aside for retirement, bukata will eat it all up. There will always be family members needing help. Imagine if you know someone hasn't eaten in 3 days. Compassion will make you dip into that retirement savings.

    My advice to children is to give their feeble parents enough for upkeep, and nothing more. Also pay for their medical insurance.

    As for siblings, If you can afford to pay their school fees, do it. Once they graduate, cut them off. If they need further assistance, then must be ready to run a business that is mutually beneficial to both of you. Resist the temptation to go big in the beginning, no matter what they say to you. Test them with a small investment first. The result would determine if a bigger business is warranted.

  8. Many parents were self-employed and in my country of Tanzania there were no retirement plans for self-employed people until 10 years ago. So the whole extended family is taking care of every member of the family.

  9. The fellow comment is negligible . Is important every parent build their own finances and stop being a burden their children's have to carry around. Times are tough out there. Thanks phrankleen