Shocking: My Husband of 10 Years is Gay // SAY IT LIKE IT IS – Ep 28
Shocking: My Husband of 10 Years is Gay // SAY IT LIKE IT IS – Ep 28
SAY IT LIKE IT IS (Playlist):
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Homosexuality is the result of epigenetic gene expression in the womb prior to birth. No one can control that. What we can control, is how we respond to it. Instead of judgement we need to understand and empathize. There is so much we are still learning about epigenetics.
So sad but you're right parents should educate their children about life and not just let them go into life without knowing what's what. Keep up the good work.
My cousin struggled with his sexuality as a teenager. He was bullied because of it and attempted suicide twice at 15. He had girlfriends and slept with them, because he was told that sleeping with girls would distract him from his attraction to guys. He was sent to a pastor to "pray the gay away." None of those "remedies" worked. His family moved to Canada and after a few years he came out. Unsurprisingly his parents and a couple of relatives are ashamed of this. It's a taboo topic, that people are reluctant to discuss. His only allies are his elder sister, friends, a couple of cousins and myself. I told him that I love and accept him, gay or not. I would rather see him happy with the man of his dreams rather than deceiving and marrying some hapless beard. Moreover, I've read a book by a South African playboy who mentioned that some married closeted gay men, feeling trapped in heterosexual relationships, take their frustrations out on their wives.
But if it was my man and he was providing and loving me, then perhaps we can make a deal that he stays in hiding as long as I also get myself a boyfriend until the children are of age. As long as we stay a loving , happy family
But remember Phrankleen that also guy men/women like children. Though I agree with you that our African society needs to face the truth.
Well executed Bro. Yes, I agree let's not deceive each other in these relationships. She must let go. Iam sure there is a good straight man out there for her.
What's new? They might as well stay married because bisexuality and homosexuality is very common among us.
Divorce and he's attached to the children obviously. So they could have a joint custody and an amicable divorce. Trust me if they go separately amicably, the guy will remain her best friend. Both of them are losers indirect and directly,but they can move on and away from each other amicably.
Religion is BS. Spent the formative years of my life going to Quranic school in Nigeria. It was such a waste of time. I wish the time was spent getting me prepared for the world. I struggled in school. It would have been more productive getting extra academic lessons.
Sometimes pressure doesn’t force someone to be guy mehn
Bro you are inter sexier really ???
The truth is 30 0/0 of men that is married today there gay I have see many because of the community so they hide it especially the black communities
Do you think homosexuality was normalized in Nigeria? That means, was homosexuality normal at anytime in the history of known Nigerian history? I would really like to hear your answer.
You are of good intentions Phrankleen. Blessings to you 🙏🏼
I wonder, does the husband doing gay to get some money.
Hard for me to think a man is attracted to another man.
Anyway sha, there are gays in nigeria also but a very few.
Spot on Phrankleen 👍🏼 feel for the lady and feel for the man, nothing more devastating then the thought of dying and realising you’ve lived a lie or lived a certain way to please other people, be true to yourselves people, we haven’t got long on this planet!
There is nothing with being gay like do your ting innit and I’m from Nigeria 🇳🇬 as well so if u were gay there, then you’d have to be low-key without getting caught cause honestly I hate for someone to go through that kind of punishment like I don’t want it there anymore PERIODTTTT
I feel sad for the lady. But I think her husband knew he was before he even got married. But because of of his cultural background he would be forced to hide his feelings towards men. The UK had that stigma centuries ago, men or women had to hide there true sexual feelings.
An whats u probkem being gay that's their life u gay hater
This is an important topic not just in Nigeria but around the world. Bigotry is the reason that we have people in the down low. Bigotry towards same gender loving people forced men and women to lie about their true identity. They must cover up their nature in order to live safely, in order to maintain a job, rent an apartment, stay out of jail, retain custody of their children, avoid being classified as insane, and or to enjoy a simple act such as a walk down the street. So yes people lie, they pretend and if you want it to stop, create an a better world. Help change the laws and minds that cause such moral injustice, so that people can be safe to be open.
We don't talk about sexuality with our parents, that's a good thing .
Divorce is the fairest outcome in this case. However, she should ensure that she and the children are taken care of financially. Finally, I agree with you about the hypocrisy of many Africans regarding homosexuality; it is widespread, but clandestine.
I don't know about Nigerian families killing their gay kids (Never heard of honour killings on gay kids in Nigeria) I know they are shunned, disowned, threatened, treated like they are possessed but outright murdered? NEVER heard of it. Its more likely that a non gay child gets murdered because a prophet tagged him a witch than for a gay person to be murdered by his family. Maybe the larger society if they feel that the gay man approached them or is soliciting gay sex. The public may violent (I use the term maybe cos they don't go out and hunt gay people)
Why are you drinking cup of coffee Frank
Lady , discuss with your husband for the sake of kids who need their dad. Please give him a second chance. The best interest of kids is the family. Please do not break the family.
Well said King!
We all only have one life to live. We should be allowed to live it in truth and not in a lie. The same thing that happened to this sister happened to me. Although shocked to the core of my very soul when I too saw the evidence before my eyes, I have leaned to forgive him over the years. Why? Because my ex also felt he had to live a lie. I just gave thanks that the HIV test I took after throwing him out, was negative….
Keep up the essential works. Jah love and Ancestral guidance and protection always.
I think they should get help by any means necessary.
Its not some book! It is THE BOOK!
Blame ingrained customs, religion, ignorance, lack of understanding and tolerance. People are forced to live lies with arranged marriages ans so on!
'Divorce, move on with your life'…. this is easier said than done.
There are millions of so-called heterosexuals who engage in sodomy with their heterosexual spouse. It is hypocritical to call out open sodomites when the heterosexual participates in the same abominable sexual acts. Talk about sucking on a penis that has been up someone's rectum, allowing that same penis to enter your vagina is confusion of the highest level.
The rising number of gay and lesbian is due to western influence. We should be copying westerners with things like democracy, rules of law, business etiquette. Not, with the LGBT stuff.
I want to drink that cup of coffee!
Thanks for the objective content, it's fantastic! My heart goes out to her, everyone wants to be quick to judge the ripple effects of a societal problem without addressing the root cause… The husband is in no way innocent in this situation but we have to recognize the gay stigma is what drove his actions. As a gay guy myself, I know my sexuality is something I could never discuss with my parents, not because I don't want to but because they couldn't possibly understand or accept it. The "ideal family picture" is slowly fading away… My advise to her is, if he is a good man and a loving father to your children, you can both have a adult conversation and reach an agreement that works for you both and the kids. Divorce never solves anything. If you want to divorce him, then do so because you want to and not feel pressured to do so. Sexuality doesn't build a home, rather mutual respect and unconditional love does.
A person can be bisexual so this man can love both sex.
Get Rid! Not because of his sexuality its because he lied!
My opinion is that she should not look at signs and conclude. She needs to have an open and direct conversation with the man or at least, have solid proof before taking a step to divorcement.
….. I know a Christian man whose wife mistreated him badly, used sex as a form of control, but even in that abuse, the man would not stray. Then the wife began to accuse him of adultery. When no woman was seen on his radar, the woman started saying he was a secret gay. But the truth of the matter was that the man was just a God-fearing person who just quietly suffered the manipulations of his wife. He was neither a womaniser nor a homosexual.
….. Deception is a great sin. But a wrong assumption could be worse!
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If you are gay deal with it,go and marry a woman.and if you are a woman that got married to gay deal with it and stay with him,as far he doesn't beat,shout and hate you,then,what is your problem.
I am sure you have a root. Rather than talk western script, you should have taken time to talk about the wisdom in your root belief system. Africa beliefs is not as bad as you and the west would love to paint it at the least convenience. Every society has its ills. For example, America has the greatest gun violence in the world because guns ownership is legal but it doesn't stop them from punishing violators of the gun use. Why didn't you prescribe reconcilation for the couple since his act is natural and acceptable behavior. Isn't it like normal infidelity or is it an irreconcilable issue? Please bro, give person a break.
I wonder if she had anything to do with her husband becoming gay. May be she giving him ass.
Why always attacking religion? If religion didn't work for you, it worked for others. You must just drag religion to every sensitive topic. Abeg, the thing don too much
Phrankleen, you said it all……. God bless your wisdom. I am Happy you are a Nigerian.
Deception is not good.
If he is no longer in Nigeria, he should have informed her and not lead her on.