Man Utd: Ruben Amorim ‘watched’ Marcus Rashford ‘GET DRESSED’

Ruben Amorim explained why he dropped Marcus Rashford and The Sun’s takeaway: He watches his players GET DRESSED.

Somebody’s watching you…
There was a wonderful openness and honesty to the way Ruben Amorim explained at length why and how Marcus Rashford and Alejandro Garnacho had been dropped. Many managers would have straight-batted a “my decision” answer, but Amorim gave a total of six ways in which he assesses his players.

“We try to evaluate everything – training performance, game performance, engagement with the teammates, push the teammates up…the way you eat, the way you put on your clothes to go the game.”

Reel in shock as the very last of those six elements is the focus of the perverts at The Sun:

Amorim fires bizarre warning to Man Utd stars as he tells them he watches everything including the way they GET DRESSED

First, absolutely not a ‘warning’; he literally said it was not a ‘message’.

Second, pretty sure he doesn’t mean he actually watches them GET DRESSED. To the non-pervert, it seems obvious that he sees who’s the last on with their kit, who doesn’t look and seem ready quickly or smartly enough. Teachers do it all the time before PE and not all of them are watching the kids GET DRESSED.

But no, the better explanation is that Amorim is just a dirty old man…

RUBEN AMORIM has bizarrely revealed that he watches the way his Manchester United squad gets DRESSED.

Probably less bizarre than him closing his eyes, lads.

Let’s get this party tarnished…
Absolute nonsense from MailOnline on the admittedly fascinating story of the leaked line-ups:

Ruben Amorim sends a message to his ‘unstoppable’ Man United dressing room ‘leak’ after fans accused axed Alejandro Garnacho and his brother of being behind derby XI being exposed

Did he say the leak was ‘unstoppable’? Did anybody? No, he said he thought it was “impossible to fix nowadays” and seemed zero degrees of arsed about the situation.

His ‘message’ was basically “it’s not a good thing but let’s move on and go to the next one and see if they find the next starting XI”. That is quite the ‘message’, we’re sure you’ll agree.

‘The party atmosphere was somewhat tarnished’? Like f*** it was.

MORE ON MAN CITY v MAN UTD FROM F365:
👉 16 Conclusions from Man City 1-2 Man Utd – Amad changes the story, but what if Pep really is done?
👉 Three short minutes of Manchester United passion enough as Manchester City get what they deserve
👉 ‘That’s why Ruben Amorim got the job’: Roy Keane believes Man United boss is ideal for Amad Diallo

A message to you…
Marcus Rashford posted on Instagram after the match: ‘Yesssssssss! Love it lads’

Obviously…

‘Marcus Rashford’s full-time message to Man Utd stars speaks volumes after derby snub’ – Mirror.

Yes, those four words really did ‘make an opinion, characteristic, or situation very clear without the use of words’. Nailed it.

You know I’m undroppable…
Mediawatch is amused by the notion of any Manchester United player being ‘undroppable’ under Ruben Amorim, a man who has already used 23 players and has utilised every single one of the 35 substitutions available to him.

And yet…

‘£42m Man Utd Star is Amorim’s Second Undroppable Player After Amad’ – GiveMeSport

‘Ruben Amorim has new Man Utd undroppable who was told to leave under Erik ten Hag’ – Express

Pesky fact: The five Manchester United players who have logged the most minutes under Ruben Amorim are Andre Onana, Bruno Fernandes, Diogo Dalot, Matthijs De Ligt and Amad Diallo.

Neither supposed new ‘undroppable’ is on that list. Almost like the concept of ‘undroppable’ is a media construct that has absolutely no connection to modern football.

The old one-two
One of the supposed undroppables (started two of seven games under Amorim) is Harry Maguire. And he has apparently taken the opportunity of this new-found status to have a massive pop at Erik ten Hag. Except, well, of course he hasn’t. That would be ludicrous.

Man Utd star Harry Maguire aims jab at Erik ten Hag with Ruben Amorim verdict

That’s the Express, looking at some utterly anodyne quotes from Maguire that do not once mention Ten Hag and deciding that this is a ‘jab’.

“It was a great performance to go there, have 50-50 of the ball and have the same amount of shots as them,” said Maguire. “It’s not been like that in recent years, so it’s an improvement, but there’s still a long way to go.”

So it’s the “not been like that in recent years” which is the supposed ‘jab’ at Ten Hag? Maguire has been at United long enough to lose against Manchester City under three other United managers, guys; it’s not a ‘jab’ at Ten Hag, it’s an acknowledgement that United have long been rather worse than serial champions Manchester City. Which idiot would suggest otherwise?

The Mirror have followed suit, claiming: ‘Harry Maguire can’t hide true feelings as he compares Ruben Amorim to Ten Hag.’

Doesn’t compare them and he says practically f*** all but carry on…