How You're Raised Affects Your Life Later On
How You're Raised Affects Your Life Later On
Have you ever wondered how your upbringing shapes your life? In this insightful video, we delve into the profound impact of childhood experiences or childhood trauma on your mental health, relationships, and lifestyle choices.
Understanding attachment styles, attachment theory and how you were raised can provide valuable insights into why we…
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why’d the captions turn into japanese midway?? 4:32
It is the most painful thing when you swear not to be like your parent and then pick up their habits. My mom has always been very critical and cold to me and recently I spent time with my cousin who was still in elementary and accidentally caught myself openly criticizing her when she would tell me or show me something. I felt horrible after and couldn’t stop thinking that I turned into the one person I never wanted to be
I never exactly got a specific parenting style, sometimes they were angry, most of the time not at me(i'm a middle child with my mom/ apart of the youngest children with my dad's side.) i grew up with glass child syndrome and perfect child syndrome, i spent the weekdays at my moms and weekends with my dad, even then my mom worked herself to the bone during my primary school years, and most of the time my dad worked on the weekends too, so i stayed home alone with my brothers most of the time, to put it bluntly. i spent more time with my brothers and teachers than i did my parents, in the end. i ended up being homeschooled after covid(which i still am today), i turned out a burnout child. i couldn't keep up, or i'm ahead, i don't know. i've developed multiple mental struggles, which my parents don't know about, i can tell that i'm isolated, its been over a year since i've even SEEN someone my age; i have a month cooldown for when i hang out with my friends(older and younger), i feel like i'm being dramatic, i mean, i've had SOME memories with them atleast, and nowadays we spend more time together, i'm alright with my childhood, its just hard to think that i had that starting at age 6.
mine was the last one they mentioned. 20 never had a job bc i was just existing up until covid, no concept of what an adult should be like, and i had this idea that uni was FREE.. bc its london i probs got it mixed up with the fact of the healthcare system.. so thought i had free choice to go or not lol. until u grow up and realise ofc the truth. my fulltime job rn IS tryna convince my mother to reorganise the whole house around bc its like a hoarder house selfishly of her messy stuff. we already have ADHD it weighs on my brain. i was grown on 0 expectations 0 structure maybe only subtle rules but never forced to do any chores. then when 16 supposed to go into the world covid hit,, so all im doing rn is freaking out on wat to do for the future bc i dont have previous talent aand hate the idea of being under corporate institutions only skill ive gained is mental/emotional/self awareness nd hyper analysing stuff n topics bc i never wana be 'not awake' again. yet also in the present moment shes too self centered and immature to wanna work WITH me in structuring the house so im battling her child brain having to undo what she did PLUS figure myself out bc i hav no friends also lol and mental health system is underfunded and didnt help me <3 ! .
<3
this voice makes me aggressive
I was 9 when my mom and I met a new neighbor. She asked about mom's kids she said she had 2. The neighbor says and who is this girl. Mom looks and me and goes oh yeah, this is my third in a dull flat voice. I was always told I was ugly fat stupid and unwanted. I heard that for 32 years.
I have pretty difficult self-image issues and I had asked my parents a while back to set me up with a therapist. I remember that the first thing she asked about was my parents. For all my life I've known that other people have horrible home lives and that I was lucky for having parents that not only adored me but also set reasonable boundaries. I've gone through a lot of research by my self because psychology is somewhat interesting to me but sometimes I forget just how impactful our childhood really is. Unfortunately that therapist was horrible and would belittle me for getting mad or upset about anything. Like I was only ever supposed to be happy. Since then I've used some of my general psychology knowledge to try and be a good friend as well as realize what caused most of my life stress. I hope every person out there who didn't get the childhood everyone deserves find peace at the very least. Everyone deserves to function happily, thank you for reading.
I feel guilty having parents like the ones at the end of the video 😭
My parents did love me, but they neglected me a lot as a kid. The only time they truly noticed me is when i do something bad, in which i get mentally attacked to the point i ran away. I came back, because again my parents do love me, but when i say parents i mean my adopted parent(singular), and i have a twin brother, a older brother, and a older sister. My sister has CF, so taking care of us can sometimes be difficult.
My mom and my stepdad always fight, and ever time they fought my step dad would go to his mom's house and be gone for a week or two, and ever time he did that my mom would drink. She would never hit me or anything, it's just the words she said hurt me more than geting slapped or hit. What hurt me the most was when she said "i wish i never had you", that's what led me to depression, i started getting mad at the smallest things and started throwing things even.
Im 11 now and im trying to be a better person, to anyone else that has to hide their depression, tell someone that can help you go through whatever you're going through, and i hope you get better❤️
2:36 monica is so me
So you’re saying our parents don’t feel bad for being bad parents? That is a really horrible view point to hold, please don’t listen to this!
My father follows the anger tutorial. When I was a child I came to the conclusion that when we were angry, we were allowed to lose control and hurt people feelings. So, I definitely learn to copy his behaviour. Today I try to be careful but that's still difficult even though I've made some progress. Badfully, my parents also didn't love me as much than needed. I burst into tears when you talked about rejection because that's what I'm living everyday. However, they don't reject me the way you talked about. It's more than my dad is narcissist and my mom depends of him (so she doesn't defend herself and her children).
what about the part where you were born as the middle child of three, and therefore not only is the unwanted and unloved child, but also the scapegoat for litterally every single action your siblings make?
Hey uh I was touch starved by my parents and now seek attention from my best friend bc she keeps me sane and happy. I wanted to ask, is it true that after the age of 10 a child doesn't need any affection?
I know my parents love me but never really brought up me in peaceful place, they always kept fighting fighting demaned my peace for life.
NOT JAPANESE ON THE SUBTITLES
I am one of those people that have a parent that treat their child as a friend and no I am not spoiled rotten because… I know the value of money… It just that my mother have simple expectations from me, its to have a good life, and that's what I am doing, she agreed about my chosen career, and of course, I have off limit(which is No alcohol and cigarettes) which is not fair since she herself smokes and, Of course I tried it in about a week, when I am in sixth grade, but never does it again because, I don't want to be like my mother wasting money on cigarettes. Well, I hope that I can keep these lesson I learned about parenting in my childhood, and yes my mother is single parent andh she had me when she's 17, but hey, so I won't do any mistake that she does like, leaving the child from other relatives because of the need of money, she goes in another country living me, and I promise myself that, I won't leave my child like that, and I want to be with my child from every moment of their life and that's also why I choose education in college
What if you don't remember most of your childhood but only remember traumatizing and happy memories?
Timestamps
1). The anger tutorial 0:30
2). Stone cold 1:59
3). Go away 3:25
4). Learned behaviour 4:06
5). Nothing's off-limits 4:39
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙