My Nigerian parents made me raise my siblings as a 10 year old
My Nigerian parents made me raise my siblings as a 10 year old
My Nigerian parents made me raise my siblings as a 10 year old
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The problem is a lot of feel powerless and have nothing to offer, the only time they feel powerful is when they are abusing their helpless children
What is so sad about all this, When these alpha people come before the white folks it's sad to see how childish they are,,,
My mother is an evil hostile being and I refuse to believe she’s an actual human being. She’s so unempathetic and evil. She knows exactly what she’s doing, she just wants to do it. Why would any normal person want to intentionally destroy their daughter? She’s so jealous of me and sees me as competition. The thought of me having a good life and being successful scares her and that’s one of the most evil things ever.
How many female’s go through this! And are needing too heal god bless you
within all families and community s
Totally children carred for eachother in a big family
Many Africans parents are purely evil, I’m going through the same emotional damage from parents whenever I’m trying to raise the subject maybe they will repent, they actually say NO instead I should sorry to them. I’m now cutting them off from my life even though I’m supporting them €300 monthly which I promised myself to do but no communication until they repent.
I'm seeing more African millenials and gen Z speaking out about this especially since I love content creators from all over my age range. So as blk Americans we are unlearning certain behaviors as we educate ourselves. I'm seeing though Africans are fighting against progress against certain things. Parentification and financial abuse primarily. Too many are too comfortable with life in inexperienced hands .And how can a man be in a home and allow things against their children? How many ppl missed out on getting a job at 15 bc they were needed at home. Or lost their part time job earnings to their parents bc they were tricked to getting an account with the parent signing? Ppl may talk about us western folks,but we are trying and yes we draw the line early with parents. It's sad to know if we weren't enslaved for 400 yrs or dealt with Jim Crowe we still would have been trampled and lashed by our own African family and their churches.And don't start me on not educating kids on the birds/bees. That's crazy bc my African ex had a niece who was beat bc her mom didn't approve the class.
https://youtu.be/VGWvBqu9D1I
I just start watching your video, I am glad it’s not late but I thank God i found you. Please I need your email
Happy new year Pharanklen.Hmmm thanks for bringing this topic to light, we really went through a lot from my parents.
I can relate with this as a the eldest child of siblings raised by a single father. I think it has moulded me into the person i am with certain defects that make me a little different from most. I had the pleasure of raising my two younger
siblings while dad worked in 60s / 70s Britain. I was in taking clothes to the laundry, ironing, cooking basic meals and taking my siblings to school. I held no grudge towards my father who often cained me for constantly misbehaving. I however find that in most aspects of life, that i turned out pretty well. However when i look at certain aspects of my life i realise just how much it must have impacted me. I can tend to be over bearing in relationships, even with my own kids and around friends as i have always been in charge but most strangely i resent mu mother so much that she could die today and i probably wouldn't shed a tear. I was robbed of my childhood and I'm still learning to be a more toleran to my children.
Thanks for this topic, at sixty (nearly sixty one) it's maybe the first time I really assessed why i am the way i am (I'm by no means damaged goods). Even though it was a different time and my circumstances weren't exclusive to me or my family. Going back to Nigeria without our dad made me the impromptu dad for a few years till he came to join us in Nigeria.
Though he's passed away, i miss him badly.
I think i have a deep seated resentment towards my mum for abandoning us and robbing me of my childhood.
Could you add the link or name of the person on the video speaking..
You are like Iyanla for Africans.
DATS WHY THE WHITE MAN AND WOMEN. MADE THE PLANTATION
My mother and father did the same to me when I came from Jamaica 🇯🇲 at the age eleven and l am in my sixties and still suffering from trauma.
Discipline and abuse are two different things for me someone might say is abused but now as an adult for me,I appreciate my dad for calling me out with a belt when I was wrong like super wrong and my conclusion that’s discipline because I was that kid capable of killing I was violent to the tip 🥱no trace to my parents i was just stubborn for no reason only time I get called out was for bad morals 😩 at some point I thought my dad only loved my sister 😩but as an adult now am like thanks because I spoke to him he said to me he needed to be the No guy since my mom was always the yes lady and the fact I was his only boy and it was just me and my sister I really appreciate him for that I got my morals in check even through I went to the best schools that made d**kheads
My cousin is also a victim of this trauma. As a child, she was forced to raise her six younger siblings because her parents marriage was so terrible that her mother was only in the house on and off. As soon as this young girl got into the university, the first stupid boy that said hello to her, she ran off with him simply because she was desperately looking for a means of escape from that overwhelming forced responsibility. She is still trapped in that toxic unhealthy relationship till today. Our people really need to do better.
Happy new year Phrankleen.
It’s sad as this emotional and toxic environment is prevalent in our society and worse under the disguise of religion.
I think it borders on exposure and education.
I grew up in Nigeria and my Dad was very affectionate towards us .
I was very bold as a child and questioned other adults in school cos of how it was at home , my Dad was very courteous, he will say please, thank you, I’m sorry etc. He actually never laid a finger on me or any of my siblings till thus day as I wasn’t a stubborn or troublesome child.
He returned from the U.K. in the 80s before getting married and having kids so that probably played a part.
On the other hand, my Mum is the typical African religious mother who believed in spare the rod and spoil the child even when they was no reason to.
In summary I think this toxic parents didn’t know better, the brutal parenting was the only language they understood.
My Dad made my mum apologised to us when she offends us obviously against her wish whilst growing up.
In summary, I think Parents should be enlightened to apologise to their children when this trauma is highlighted to foster a better relationship and help with their healing journey. Gone are the days when you force kids to love ‘parents’ because they are ‘your Parent’
Happy New year I try to advice them here in West African on your topic don’t know if they take it on board they try to get me into religion but I tell them how the religion came about through abuse hundreds of years ago then I get a blank look and they do not reply to me but I keep on trying . They automatically think I am very religious because I am a British National but I make it clear that I am not
Religious person and I know the colonial history and where this all came from.
You are so RIGHT Mr. Phrankleen. Most Africans don´t understand what a TRAUMA is. They think we are doing too much expressing our feelings about every situation. And the reason of not trying to understand what a TRAUMA is, is due to LACK OF LOVE between us. Even within our FAMILIES, WE LACK THAT LOVE in some African HOMES.
This is 2023, let´s hope we UNLEARN from this attitude.
This lady is really passing through alot. Her bucket is FULL to the extent that she can´t take it anymore. She needs to see a Therapist ASAP.