If My Man Keeps Going 50 / 50 With the DIASPORA BILLS – He is Less of a MAN
If My Man Keeps Going 50 / 50 With the DIASPORA BILLS – He is Less of a MAN
If My Man Keeps Going 50 / 50 With the DIASPORA BILLS – He is Less of a MAN
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Some people are dubious; they will never let you know their deepest part. They will wait until you invest your entire life in them.
l dont think one should marry a single mother with youg children because of the numerous diadvantages but one can when her children are adults and out of the house.
Any woman that loves you would contribute towards the bills it shouldn’t be planned it shouldn’t be a must. If as a man you’re going to work boss paying the rent/mortgage gas electricity council tax et cetera and the woman is seeing you Busting a gut going out to pay all these bills and doesn’t contribute. I don’t think she is a good woman. It shouldn’t be mandatory that a woman should split 50-50. I know I wouldn’t make my woman split 50-50 with me on the house bills I’ll leave it up to her to decide if she wants to help me or not but if she really loves you she would contribute in some way. If she doesn’t contribute I would re-evaluate our relationship
She's probably a 'feminist'
Yeewande X spot on. I totally agree with everything you said. So true!
When women talk about their house chores I just smile 😊… House chores also includes mowing the lawn, trimming the trees, moving objects above 50 lbs, tactically kill rodents if any, concrete work/repairs, fixing/maintaining the cars, fixing the lighting fixtures, HVAC (heating, ventilation air conditioning), electrical and plumbing etc….
You give 100% until you realize your husband risks your entire savings on business deals without consulting the wife and gives loads of money to his family without consulting the wife…so nothing is set in stone ideally we should trust our spouses 100% but reality is opposite
Woman is a mans help mate. We should equally contribute to building our future.
I have been married for 4years and not even a day have we had problems about finance. Every month end we both bring our pay check on the table my husband ends more than me. We Make a list of expenses for that month, pay all bills, and what is left we set some for savings, give ourselves pocket allowance for the month and set some for miscellaneous incase of emergency. It has worked wonders and we have never had problems. Finance is something that can bring problems in marriage so you must be wise in that domain to keep life and your marriage going well.
Very good input from Dawn!
For me personally, I work 40 hours a week too. Plus, I am mother, caretaker of the home, children etc… While, my husbands primary focus is to work outside the home. I could not function at my optimal potential needing to be concerned with a 100/100 FINANCIAL blueprint when I have responsibilities as a Mother that my now ex-husband did not feel was his responsibility as a man. Where do you draw the line then as woman to function in a way where she does not burn out?
I agree. A woman should certainly have her own money. I don't understand the vex money idea 🤷🏾
😆 @ "shouldn't be smashing me to aggressively"….too funny
Am not married but I have 2 kids with my girlfriend. I know the struggle taking care of the kids. Most of the time when I get home and she didn’t cook am not bothered because I know she was tired and had a long day with the kids. I will make my own thing and one thing she does which I love and respect her for is, she always make sure she cook rice down. That way no matter how late I get home I can eat the rice with anything in the fridge. With finance she pay some and I pay some. When she is struggling she tells me and I help or put money in her account. The same way when am struggling I tell her and she ask me how much I need and give it to me or take care of the bills. Am happy we run the house that way because we both understand we need to help each other..
Yall do know the women are the one losing here. In the beginning of the time the man provides while the women stay at work and do all the work. Now that women are providing they are now doing two work. Have you ever seen an African man work and come back at help at home too. Ever African marriage I have seen the women go to works and still come back to look after the family wellbeing and childcare. Those the same men expect those women to cook for them, sever them, look after like the men are the second baby of the house. There alot of researchers to back up this. Men are winning in marriage while the women suffers. Some men can't even tell you the name, date of birth or anything about their kid because that is a woman's work. Please 50 50 is for Everything not just for money so miss me with all this bull. Even for you as a youtuber you are a man expect that from you but please speak for but side if you are talking about things like this
A family should pull together to be successful. As a woman I believe there should be transparency, I have always taken care of the bills, I don't wait for tne man. Unfortunately some men will take advantage not to contribute much. My ex-husband used the opportunity to secretly buy land for himself without my knowledge. I later heard him telling people I was cheap to maintain, because he only bought food. Yes the bill should be 50/50 "no cheating.
Some men receive all the benefits, work most days leaving the woman with children and still expects her to contribute 50/50 from one or two night shifts she does a week
Bruv, you're super brilliant and versed. Well done!
Phrankleen…a masculine man’s role is to provide and protect periodt👀. He should be paying at least 80% of household bills. The woman if she chooses too….20% at best of household expenses.
Dawn is definitely a girl after my own heart. We do 50/50 all the way 🤩🤩
"My villagers are behind the camera…" That's a good one!!🤣
@Eny Mill, I think some very successful men are very naive and arrogant without even knowing and are not willing to respect the woman they are with. Most successful African men are intimidated by successful African men, but are very accommodating when they are with women of other nationalities.
I just think both African gender needs to be honest and open when getting into marriage and communicate, why would you want to be with someone that you can't communicate with and being honest and open with.
Morning, I'm late.
I was not raised to see a man do 50/50. But since now women love to wear the pants and so independent that man is like u cover this u i will cover that. 😂
I'm yet to see a woman who doesn't keep a secret stash. The feministic narrative encourages women to practice this self sabotage.
You can hardly sustain a family alone abroad. The system is built to make sure you are both working. Of course there are exceptions but generally you cannot take care of your family alone in a country where good housing takes 30-50% of your income. In Africa people's one month salary can pay their total rent for the year. It's a different world in the west and those who fail to adapt get caught up in this mess.
As African woman,a man is less a man, when he failed to take of his immediate family. Most of African men take care iof outsiders than their immediately families that is the truth. When the men changes this,the wives could 100 according for what they make.
Those set of wives that weaponize the pain they endure during child birth on their husbands just want to have their cake and eat it all, they only complain only when things do not go their way. But guess what, they all fail to see the unfairness that exist when their child have more strong emotional bond with them than their husbands.
A man should provide and lead Diaspora or Africa ,women are helpers honestly I don't get how ill split 50-50 bills with my husband on everything and I still see him as one its distasteful even to just think of it …please don't get me wrong but if a man can't provide he has no business getting married in the first place…the location doesn't matter.
In my opinion from an Igbo Nigerian cultural perspective, men take care of bills. It’s an unspoken understanding amongst us. In fact, our Igbo men feel insulted if their lady wants to chip. It doesn’t mean I don’t surprise hubby with stuff, it doesn’t also mean I wait for his money to pick up little bills here and there. In essence we discussed how we plan to handle the family’s finances and we review it periodically depending on changes in our income. It’s how I saw my parents live, it’s how he’s lived and we therefore live that way due to our foundation. And of course I stay in the US and moved here as a medical doctor already. Hubby also came here as an adult too. We met here, saw the financial challenges here but our foundation still made us live the way we do and it’s cos we truly understand and appreciate each other.
@Eny, please may be avoiding you because of your personality?
In my opinion, there should be contributory joint account ( not 50 – 50 but as mutually agreed ) strictly for day to day running of the family while either spouse is at liberty to manage whatever is left over to take care of their personal expenses……..while there is need for unity, there should also be room for freedom.
As the man, I reiterate it everyday to my wife " the entire family expenses monthly should be within what the income of one person can take care of, in event one person looses their source of income ".
My take is this. It annoys me when working people claim to "Have their own money."
Life is fickle dont we see? Now I am not even Nigerian but I would venture to see any change in perspective and roles is not as simple as "get on with it" Why? Because culture is deep rooted and if guy has never seen his great grand dad or dad or uncles do a thing, in his mind it is an abomination, and not a simple mindset change.
Giving the geezer ultimatums is not helpful.
Change need to be gradual.
For me I think there is no straight solution..it depends on the individuals..buh the most important key factor is discuss, dialogue about the family finances and come to a middle ground such that it will be fair to both parties…and yes the man especially in the modern day family should help out with house chores if u can't cook , there must be somethings you can do around the house to help ur partner and vice versa…
Successful men are too arrogant my personal experience
My thoughts on the comment on women running away from High Networth men, it the case of a union of people from two different worlds! it's normal for the lower-earning one to have some fear and up to the richer one to help her go through the process. One standing question could be "How much of myself would I have to let go to keep this union?" No one wants to be in a union where they have no voice.
ChidiE spoke well, to expand on what he said, boys who grow up with spoilt and pampered attitudes display Narcissistic behavioural patterns in their marriages. 😢
I wish Phrankleen can talk to my folks. I am a devil today for telling these same truths.
Especially the Nigerian RN who go to nursing school at old age because of financial situation, they are the ones that treat men like shit when they start making money as RN
Some Nigerian men are scared of successful women too. They don't want a woman that makes more money than them.
Yewande hit the nail on the head. I pray she finds a good man, if she is not married. If she is married her husband she treat her well.
What happens when you have a husband that always sends money to different people back home as soon as he receives his salary?