9 Harsh Truths About How Relationships Work – Jillian Turecki
9 Harsh Truths About How Relationships Work – Jillian Turecki
Jillian Turecki is a relationship coach, teacher, writer and author.
How do you create a thriving and loving relationship that truly lasts? While many may stumble into one by chance, building a deep and meaningful connection often requires more than luck. So what role does the inner work play in not just finding love, but building a…
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Hello you savages. Get my free Reading List of 100 life-changing books here – https://chriswillx.com/books/ Here's the timestamps:
00:00 It Begins With You
05:05 The Parallels Between Romance & Business
14:06 The Stories We Create in Our Minds
20:00 Why Accountability in a Relationship is So Important
25:43 How to Stop Your Mind Being a Battlefield
28:57 Differentiating Love & Lust
40:03 The Importance of Self Love
44:13 Speak Up & Tell the Truth in Relationships
51:58 What Do Women Really Want From Men?
1:05:48 How Stress & Fear Ruin Relationships
1:14:00 Relationships Aren’t Supposed to Make You Happy
1:18:50 Why You Need to Make Peace With Your Parents
1:30:06 Where to Find Jillian
You both have a new fan!!!!! ❤❤❤ What a wonderful interview, how insightful, and Jillian, girl you are on fire!!! Love this!!!
My trick is whenever I notice dark thoughts coming in my mind about my relationship or my partner, I take a nap or in the evening I go to bed. The next day the problem isn't nearly as bad anymore and the original thoughts are overblown. Its worked for 16 years now, so just wanted to share.
Immediate nope
When a Millennial uses "epic" within the first 10 minutes into a podcast more than once… I'm out! ✌🏽
I'm so fed up with the safety argument. We can only provide it so much and so often. What I experienced first hand a couple of times now is that women have a huge amount of unspoken expectations and if they are not met, it comes as a disguise of not "feeling save". Sorry we men are able to provide and protect, but this does not mean that we are all the time responsible for your well being and happiness. Women who do not feel safe in the presence of a man should honestly ask themselves what exactly is triggering their feeling. We men struggle a lot in these days to find meaning an purpose. Those of us who managed to excel in being happy alone and following our path… We have enough shit to fight with. If you are not abel to add to our peace you can kindly go and bother someone else.
Please women, for the love of god. If you find yourself in the process of thinking "I do not feel safe with this man". Think twice and ask yourself honestly: is it safety or are my needs not met. If you expect someone to fulfill your needs without telling them, you will be disappointed. If you expect safety, ask yourself what danger you are experiencing where the man is not able to protect you…
There is sadly a lot of advice from women to men on how to behave and not a lot advice for women.
Every relationship is a two way street, and I'm fed up, that we are constantly told to do so and so much and should walk the whole street down. Or did you see in this podcast any point about "What men need from women"?
Sadly it is easier now to stay alone in peace as it is nearly impossible to find a true connection with honest long term commitment to work on a relationship.
It is an interesting thought experiment to turn the statement that primarily "women want safety" over and evaluate it as "women's primary driver is fear."
i love Jillian
yeah no.
After being ghosted when i most needed a friend who i actually loved dearly and let down by friends and family when i was the one who needed help, i want no more friends and i will never love anyone ever again. i don't care about my future i have lived enough experiences in life, most all beliefs of love and friendships never existed in reality, they were only naive beliefs. nobody is capable of caring like i do, so i dont care anymore.
if i find a way to live without what drives me the most, good, if not good either way, i simiply dont care anymore. let people continue to suffer and become homeless and twisted minds causing more suffering to others, because of the garbage way of looking at lifes standards generally accepted. whatever, you are just animals anyways.
Having children reveals every deepest part of you!!! It’s the ultimate in bringing everything to the surface and seeing how you really cope with things. Triggers everything in a good and bad way and you have to face it and deal with it asap so you don’t pass any generational or life trauma onto these beautiful babies. Also trying to deal with that whilst your partner is dealing with theirs too. The pressure is so big and can really push people apart. It takes a lot to fully support each other whist trying to raise a child too and then trying to live a life that is fulfilling and supportive for both of you 🥹
Managing people
Another amazing watch
I listened to this podcast in the car.. a lot of the comments here confirmed what I thought!
I go anywhere by myself. I do not live in fear. I do need to feel safe in a relationship. I don't depend on a man to feel safe. I've been sober for 16 years. I do continuous work on myself. Happiness is not the goal for me. Usefulness and purpose are my goals. If I'm doing those two things properly. I tend to find happiness. Romantic relationships are difficult for me. I'm a bad reactor, and being sober is a problem in itself. I focus on me. Im happiest focusing on me and not a romantic partner.❤
16:20
Is this Russ’s therapist?? Iykyk
Chris, you ought to have Russ on. For real. Listen to his Entire Santiago album and tell me I’m not on to something here. Also, Russ’s book is called It’s all in your head… I don’t think this is a coincidence. She must be a Russ fan 😂
I’m a man so my opinion is skewed to only look at women which is who I’m dating but all I can find is women that are only looking for this magical spark and it seems like we just keep teaching women to look for this magical spark, which is this ultimately fleeting thing and you wonder why relationships will last like 8 to 10 months and no one‘s ever sticking around or staying together I don’t think people really understand how much work it actually takes to be in a long-term relationship and honestly if you look at things correctly, it’s really not a lot of work. It’s just deciding we’re going to stay together. It’s a simple as that.
A perfect voice (such as hers) makes the conversación really enjoyable. As a Spanish listener, that is something to feel grateful.
great job
Chris, regular savage here. I would really like to see a few more wise and learn'd ladies on the show. I think we need more of the modern wisdom from their side of the fence (for want of a better word). And especially in the toxic relationship, finding, maintaining and understanding eather we find ourselves in; as the culture war, the redpill idiocy etc has dominated the discourse and driven in wedges between men and women, often just for the novelty of outrage.
Crack on son, more power to your elbow.
Great episode!
What is the books name she is referring to ?
Her cable for her mic could be set up so much nicer
Wow, what if we do not have family? What if our relationship and friendships are all we have as family? Everybody needs to be loved unconditionally a little somewhere… These rules for relationships seem to be only for people with a great family and a lucky life in general.
That film 500 Days of Summer sounds very much like Groundhog Day.
Even with a Romantic Relationship Think Tank. There is no visible way to guide a couple at age 16 to 96. Where the couple can stay happy with each other and no problems within the relationship at all. No way can that happen. It’s all about favourable odds in life and odds. For example. I as a man. In my head if I want a romantic relationship with a woman with favourable odds as a win. I have to only basically Date a woman who is single, childless like me. Her parents are together. She has a sibling at least. We are both financially on track/Listen to similar music. Both of us are Fit. Its should work. If she meets me and is just separated and has 5 kids from three different fathers. It can’t work with the second woman with 5 kids with 3 fathers. Not for me. The Drama is already in sight.