5 Ways to deal with Controlling Parents
Phrankleen
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Phrank thank you for this. Deep down I don’t think God is a bad person but I even started straying away from God because I felt as though God is in agreement with African parents abusing their children. And😂😂😂lord knows how many times I was cursed by my parents : being told if I leave my life will go bad and blessing from god will stop. She is a control freak. My mom feels entitled to my money and she opens my letter from confidential letters from work to letters from the uscis. And she has a habit of “helping me out” so she can have control of my life. I can’t date cause she has this insane obsession with my virginity and she wants to control what I eat, who I listen to, who are my friends I AM TIRED. I want to move out but she finds clever ways of sucking me dry of my money and does not want me to move out and calls my uncles and step dad to talk me out of moving out
Dealing with mom sister she control mine life cant spend with other family sad
These are the parents who used to fight everyone in their days but they don’t want u to live your life
Hi I’m currently in university in America with low pay and an inflation in the country…. I don’t like to rely on my family for money but it’s extremely hard to survive out here while in school but they don’t respect my boundaries and are controlling. I don’t live with them but they help fund my sister and I for school. What can I do without causing them to cut our funding. I won’t be able to be completely independent until I graduate college and get a degree that will help me to afford living on my own? What can I do? I would like to work a side job that will actually help than hurt me. I’ve tried doordash and Instacart but because gas is so expensive, it’s not a reliable side job. It’s so hard out here
All parents who can afford it buy property which has a self contained studio flat attached, that way a chd gets in2 hicups ND comes back home they can live in the studio bc living together can be a challenge especially if u r someone who lives orderly nd keeps yr home clean. it's hard when children come back home and dnt keep the kitchen bathroom ND toilet clean. it can work both ways where both parents ND children will eventually hv clashes.
This sounds like Jamaican parents. My parents were angry with me for closing the door to the room I stay in. When I moved back from college, My parents dictated the clothes I wear and want to check my mail. I was in my 20s , my dad screamed at me when I softly confronted him about checking my mail. If I speak up for my self my parents interpret it as hate. I have to admit, things got better when I gained steady employment. Fortunately, I am a single woman. The Great Recession made it hard for me to find a job after recession. They “encouraged”me to further my education to get a more marketable degree. I figure I do that while looking for work. My parents volunteered financed gradschool. Worst mistake as a young adult. It made it even harder to steady work during recession. That action gave them permission to dictate everything in my life. Every time, I came home I was interrogated by my father. When I stood up for myself, I felt guilty because of they felt I was ungrateful. The minute I began removed myself financially, I start regaining control. I love my parents. I’m sometimes reluctant to accept money, I know they will emotionally blackmail me with it.
Cultural difference Frank: an unmarried woman in Nigeria living alone is not socially acceptable kind of as against western culture
Do u think people with controling parents are more likely to think far ahead into the future
I know a 53 yr old Nigerian male that's going through this with his parents and he lives here in America and they live in Nigeria, still controlling him to this day. SMDH
Preach🙌🏾🙏🏽🇳🇬
It's not easy, my father became attached to me because he doesn't have a good relationship with my mom, so since he retired he made me his companion, I was just 7 years old when he retarded. Now I'm with 32 and he still treats me as a child, texting me while I'm out, complaining when I come back home early and he tries to do everything for us to make us stay at home with him, he was picking up my sister every single day of her job, for instance. He also make us feel guilty if we wanted to moved on, it was like abandon him, but I was thinking, mostly moved on and their parents never say that they were abandoning them.
Mine are not control but plain gullible. They take my money and give it to relatives and their favorite children.
Thank you so much for this video 🙏🏼 May God bless you. I have been mentally and emotionally abused for years by a manipulative controlling and overbearing parent. Your video has reminded me not to give up hope. I’m only 24 but I will make a plan because I cannot take it any longer. So Glad to know I’m not the only African child who has been told that they are cursed. Some people will really go through evil, horrific methods of control. Luckily I have supportive people in my life.
Hello, just stumbled on your video and its amazing how you hit the nail on the head on this issue of controlling parents. My mum is a control freak and also uses emotional black mail to get things from us, my brother and i.. I discovered it this year cos i just finished uni and thank God I got a job, started making my own money, then she started telling me how much i should bring for food, how much i should contribute for light bill, i'm like NO!!!! you dont tell me how to spend my money, it is MY HARD EARNED MONEY!! and then she said, if i dont bring 20k, i would eat only once in the house, i'm like no problem, i can take care of myself, she returned the money i sent as my own contribution, omo i used the money to take care of myself. Meanwhile, my dad was fully on my side. Do u know she kept on waking me up to talk about how she sent me to expensive school, how she did this and that for me, you know emotional manipulation, she even called a family member to talk to me, i still stood my ground. On the other hand, my brother is always pleasing her and now, he's suffering it. The thing is,If you're not strong emotionally and financially, they would drag u into the mud.
We were brainwashed to be submissive and obedient. To be contemptuous of those who had the courage to set themselves free. We were taught by parents who were mostly self righteous and vain that our salvation lies within our unequivocal devotion to them. The truth is you can be smarter, more courageous with a greater sense of integrity than your parents! The idea that age and status are consubstantial to wisdom is a medieval abomination! Yet, here we are in the 21st century debating the obvious! A society that doesn’t question itself is stagnant!
Please translate thanks to subtitles in French
Yasss everything was on target and definitely got a good laugh 😂
YouTube is so shady they unliked the video right after the commercial
Phrankleen this message couldn't have come at a better time I have literally been going through boundary and respect issues for the past couple years Ive literally been traumatized by my parents at 30 yrs old married with two kids I was still seeking their approval for everything, after the last incident I have decided it's best to keep space until they learn to respect me
@25:51 bingo!!!
Man this was so good. Thank you 🙏🏾
That's right. Get Out of their house!!! Get Out! Get a place of your own. Don't apologize. Move Out!!
Unable to say No?????? She needs to move away from parents period!!
This is crazy! Going through their mail? Yes, it's because they live with the parents. Emotional blackmail.
This is the first time I've heard this truthful telling re controlling African parents.
Excellent topic! I have friends from Nigeria who now live in the USA many years. Their parents still try to control them. Two of them changed their phone numbers, and have taken charge of their lives. They refused any money from their parents that was a ( blackmail). They both are able professionals with their own money.
I can really relate to this.
Thank God I live on my own. It is really good to limit contact with parents.
Thank you Bro for bringing this Topic and was really interesting.
And you really made my day😂😂😂of your contributions.
In this situation the guy has no right since he’s living with his parents at that age, he shouldn’t have taken the girl to his parents house.
Man. Phrankleen is a genius. You always say it like it is. God bless you bro 👍🏽🙏🏾
The quickest way: be financially independent 😂
Phrankleen is amazing. I love his channel. He should do a podcast
There comes a time in your life that you have to take control as an adult. Your parents can advise as parents but you as adults needs to be sensible to rationalise advise you are given especially when you are married and have a family of your own. Listen to what they have to say and make up your own mind what u want to do. Make use of good advice and discard bad ones.
I'm just mentally done….my parents just drained the shit out of me. I'm moving out by next week